Fear is one of those emotions I get struck by, and suddenly I can’t remember any of my pain clinic tools at all. I’m stuck in a loop where I think my next move is probably when an injury will happen and so I better just freeze. All of my habits I’ve learned where I manage chronic pain and walk and stand despite the pain go out the window. From the outside it seems totally irrational, but from my perspective it’s like the only possibility. I had this fear take over today, but I realized it’s probably coming from the fact that my leg is simply really tired and my body is telling me to stop. I’ve been pushing it each day to do more and try new things and it’s just pretty sore. It’s telling me, “I’m done.” I’ve learned that because I have chronic pain in that area my brain is super sensitive to any sensation there, so fatigue and soreness are overwhelming. Maybe I don’t have to go to the nuclear option that I’m about to injure myself. Maybe I just a need to rest. Let’s see if I can remember this next time.


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